.:home aLone... :.

family had went to UK for holiday on Tuesday..and today is my 4th day being home alone...hmm..had already slept 3 nites all alone in this big house...really missed my family a lot...missed them so much that it makes me almost sleep in tears every nite.. :( really felt lonely at home...
but..luckily my uncle n aunt n cousins are very caring where they came over to have dinner with me..and also luckily i also have a group of very good frens who came n accompany me and bring me out for those 3 nites..they came n accompanied me till late and when they left...lonesome come to Sunnie again...

to many ppl out there..i give them a perception tat i'm a very tough person..with strong personality..that can stand firm n strong...but wat's inside me??? they never knows..and it don't seem to be possible for them to know unless their 6th or 7th sense is real great...

actually...are there really all these 6th n 7th sense?..wat are intuitions?..they seem to vague..are they merely jus feelings and thoughts??...where our heart n mind meet to feel the future??..does this really exists??..i can't deny it..but how can i agree with it??...i really dunno...at times these kinds of things seems scary to me..especially when wat my 6th sense or intuition felt do came into live...

and recently...i dunno what m i feeling...had very mixed feelings..is it because my mind n heart are moving separately in different direction??...and thus causing me not knowing wat's in my mind..and lead to a different Sunnie now...dunno how long can these go on and when will it end...more like..i dunno whether i want to put an end to this a not...
what's wrong with me??..what'd happened to me?? if u asked...i really dunno..tat's wat i can say...i dunno...

well..i have a fren...who tell me to find someone to talk to when i'm down or etc..he asked me to talk to ppl and dun keep everything to myself...but because of the betrayal i'd faced before..i'd become not willing..more like dun dare to tell others...and dunno why...without needing me to tell him my things..he jus seemed to know that i'm not fine...

and another person like this is my best-est fren...she's my best listener and the best person i'll talk to when i'm down..and she just seems to know me..i dun have to say much to her and she jus knows...she have very big influence on me..cos she's like my sis...and because we are so close..there are times where i choose not to tell her some things..cos i dun wan her to be worried bout me..
more like..besides of the reason of betrayal..i dun tell ppl due to not wanting to make them worried...thus rather keep it to my own...

haih..i really dunno wat's wrong with me...dunno wat m i writing here...is it because of being home alone..thus in such empty space..many things jus pop-up in my mind...

and because of these...me have really mixed feelings now...really wanna go for hols or away from kl for a moment to relax..feel like going to genting or some mountain to chill out and scream everything out....aaahhhhh ! ! !
really wan my family to be back soon......AAAAAHHHHHH.... ! !

Quote: even the happiest person on earth also have unhappy moments...same goes to ...even the strongest person do have their weakest moment..cos nobody is perfect..and are these the symptoms of my bi-personality?? or i really have it all these while..jus me myself dun wanna admit it???

Thought: learn to appreciate everything when u r having it when u have it close to u..dun come too late to appreciate it..cos there are really times when it is jus too late....as there's no turn-back in time.............